https://youtu.be/XXISIikbKU4 This week’s portion is “Mishpatim”. We now start to get introduced to the other commandments after Moses received the initial Ten Commandments. We now drill down into further levels of G-d’s teaching as we see how to act and behave in His Universe. The first of the post-Ten Commandments commandments deals with slaves. These are indentured servants who are paying off a fine for thievery. Further on into the portion, there are discussions of an unbetrothed woman who is attacked, burglars that invade a home to steal, persecution of strangers, false reports about people, and people’s livestock who are in trouble owned by someone you may not like. Before discussing these, consider that there are various concepts that we use to analyze and understand Torah. In the Torah, nothing is random. Every sentence is in a specific place by design. It is interesting, then, that these are presented where they are. The Ten Commandments are, of course, the most important. It stands to reason, then, that what would immediately follow those are next in importance in the grand scheme of things. There are other commandments mentioned, but these seem to have something in common: they all protect those most vulnerable in society. This also says something about Judaism and tells us on what we, as a people, need to focus. A few years ago, I was spending part of the day running errands and was, as usual, in a hurry I had stopped at one particular store where the credit card terminals had just stopped working. I, of course, was getting very impatient and angry at how these people were inconveniencing me. Meanwhile, the clerk/manager was doing everything she could to take my card manually. As I watched her, I started to come out of myself and see her frustration and almost intimidation as she struggles to get the job done. I settled down, almost feeling ashamed of myself for my nasty thoughts. I relayed this story on social media and someone mentioned that you can always tell the character of someone by how they treat a waitress. There are some people who like to be in control over others. This makes them feel superior. These are people who have low self-esteem and they are compensating. The problem is that they do it at someone else’s expense because typically they are forcing their “power” over them. This is why these commandments are necessary, to prevent abusing others. The most vulnerable people in society are slaves or indentured servants. Judaism demands that even these people, on the lowest rung of society, get treated with respect. It is so important, that right after the discussion about the rights of slaves that Torah introduces us to lex talionis, the law of the tally, or measure for measure. Even slaves get justice. We also see the laws of gossip. Many may be thinking, oh, no, not again! Not yet another discussion of gossip! Does the Torah really mention it so many times? Yes, it does, and for good reason. The commandment here admonishes us not to join in the company of those who gossip or give a false report. The idea of false witnesses is critical because the results can be devastating. In the justice system, a great many cases are decided on the basis of testimony from witnesses. In Judaism, two witnesses are needed to convict someone. People may get together and plot to discredit someone by embellishing the truth. As a check to this, the Torah provides that if at least two other people come forward and dispute the first two witnesses’ testimony the defendant is vindicated. This prevents the devastating situation of an innocent person suffering an unwarranted judgment. Furthermore, if the first two witnesses are discredited, they receive the punishment that would have been meted out to the accused. A very harsh consequence for those who prefer power and control to honesty and integrity. We need to treat people with respect. Hillel knew this concept. When his future protégé showed up at his door and asked to be taught Torah while standing on one foot, how did Hillel respond? He didn’t say “The L-rd our G-d took us out of Egypt to be our G-d” or “Honor the Sabbath”. He talked about the best way to treat others by not doing to others what is hateful to yourself. Let’s all remember that. #FridayNightSermon

https://youtu.be/ewe7vOW_Jgo #ParashatShoftim #DvarTorah #TorahCommentary

https://youtu.be/eewNUIcJ-GM One of the things I noticed when praying Shachrit the other day is the nature of the prayers. The great majority of them tend to be prayers of thankfulness and acknowledgement of Hashem’s grace, power, knowledge and watching over us. Many of the prayers end with the acknowledgement of G-d bringing us, his chosen people, out of the bondage of Egyptian slavery to be our G-d. Consider that many people pray because they want something. People typically pray for good or better health, more wealth or prosperity, or guidance to navigate life’s problems. Many people also only start praying when there’s an emergency and things seem very challenging. Having said that, there are personal prayers at the beginning of the Shachrit (morning) service. These are prayers that acknowledge G-d for having done things for us, like giving us guidance, strength and good health. There are also prayers asking for us to not come in contact with obstructions or negative situations or people. Many people seek spirituality because of life’s challenges. They are looking for personal guidance to help them succeed and overcome problems. They want something that will basically tell them what to do in times of trouble. It would seem as of Judaism is lacking in this. While we can look for some of these messages in our daily liturgy and some comfort in some of the psalms and proverbs. People can also look toward the Talmud; while it is a compendium of Jewish laws or halacha, there are some parts of it that have personal application. They’re not so evident, however, they need to be searched out. This is probably why a lot of people, Jewish people especially, are investigating Kabbalah. They see that it is involved in Jewish “mysticism” and deduce that it has the answers to life’s tough questions as well as, as one would expect, the answers. They feel that the wisdom of life is there, but it is couched in mystery. All we have to do is figure out the magic formula based on some combination of Hebrew letters or words and voila, all your cares and troubles vanish. Such couldn’t be further from the truth of traditional Judaism. If nothing else, we have 613 commandments. A “commandment” is to DO something. Judaism is a philosophy of action. The commandments tell us how to behave, when and where. They tell us what to do an what not to do. Very simple. Yet those prayers, which are really religious affirmations, are very broad. They address concepts and attributes of Hashem, such as mercy, power, and justice. There are also psalms of praise for Hashem. The real question, then, is what do we do with this? How do we apply them to our own lives? How do find comfort in these prayers and most important, how do we use them as guidance? Ultimately, that’s really all there is. Some may find it frustrating, but it is quite simple. We just go with the program. The frustration is involved because we as humans can be quite insecure about our lives and the decisions we make. How do we behave in a job or a relationship that gives us no satisfaction? The answer is really quite simple. This is why we study Torah. There is probably no question or concern that we have that the Torah doesn’t answer or address. The bottom line is that it is about doing what we are supposed to be doing by following the teaching of Hashem. The prayers, then, are really for comfort while we are living. Perhaps we are in a trying situation and need a resolve. Hashem acts in a perfect timing that may elude us. So while we are waiting for the resolution, the prayers are there to give us comfort. In the final analysis, it is really quite simple. We adhere to the commandments which tell us how to live a righteous life; we wear the tzitzi and tefillin and put mezuzot on our doorposts as reminders to keep doing it; and we pray for the daily comfort and reinforcement that Hashem has our backs. It doesn’t get any easier than that. #FridayNightSermon #PowerofPrayer

https://youtu.be/QCXd9HsrIPo Shabbat services this week at Congregation B'nai Chaim, Murrieta, CA: Ma'ariv Services Friday evening, January 25, 2019 @ 7pm. Shachrit Saturday morning, January 26 @ 9:30am Parshas Yisro – The Ten Commandments The Reiter Family will sponsor bagels, lox, licorice, pretzels and VC to memorialize her sister’s yarzheit. Shabbat Services the following week: Ma'ariv Services Friday evening, February 1, 2019 @ 7pm. Shachrit Saturday morning, February 2 @ 9:30am Parshat Mishpatim / פרשת משפטים #ParashatYitro #TorahCommentary #DvarTorah

https://youtu.be/B1ovQqyncWc #ParashatBeshalach #DvarTorah #TorahCommentary

https://youtu.be/d_UC21oGvR8 The concept of forgiveness has intrigued me for years. There are a lot of reasons for this, but the main reason is that I never quite understood what it was. Probably like most people, I held the popular definition of forgiveness to be letting someone off the hook. It seemed like forgiveness was all about someone apologizes, or sometimes they don’t, and you decide that it was OK. If one were to search the word “forgive” on Google, one would see the definition of “stop feeling angry or resentful towards someone”, cancel a debt, and as a “request to excuse or regard indulgently ones’ foibles, ignorance or impoliteness”. Forgiving is used a lot in religion. The concept centers around how people are not perfect, and everyone makes mistakes. This is a common conception and deserves more attention. Forgiveness is also an important concept in Psychology. Many people are dealing with situations that left them in various stages of emotional trauma from people who hurt, demeaned or berated their self-esteem. Counselors and therapists will say that we forgive those that hurt us so that we can move on with our lives and not be burdened by the emotional trauma that interferes with our happiness and contentment. In Judaism, in order to forgive or be forgiven, one must first repent. This is borne out in our weekday Tefillah, or Amidah. In the weekday version, the prayer for repenting precedes the prayer for forgiveness. Most Jews know that there for our daily obligation, there are three prayer services: Evening, Morning and Afternoon. This is, however, a fourth prayer service. It is called the bedtime Shema. As per its name, it is the prayers that we say right before going to bed. It is arranged to bring a certain peace so that one can retire and sleep peacefully. In one of the prayer books (Artscroll Mesorah), the very first prayer is one of forgiveness. It starts off by stating, “I hereby forgive anyone who angered or antagonized me or who sinned against me”. Later, it states, “May no [one] be punished because of me”. Noble, yes, but what does that really do for us? Consider that the point of this “forgiveness” is to bring us to peace. How do we achieve peace knowing that people have hurt us? How do we settle into a peaceful sleep knowing that people have sought to injure us emotionally by demeaning and denigrating us? Perhaps the best answer to these questions is that these people hurt us because that’s who they are. These people engaged in negative behavior because it’s a function of their character. They hurt us because we were there, and we hadn’t been there, it would have been someone else or other people would have tried to demean us. In other words, it was about them, not us. They just needed a scapegoat. In the Torah, we are seeing how Moshe Rabbeinu appealed to Pharaoh to “Let our people go”. Pharaoh’s heart was hardened. He was who he was, a dictator that would do as he saw fit ignoring the plagues and majesty and power of Hashem. Rather than be a mensch and say, OK, you people have served us long enough, you deserve your freedom, he clung to his perception of power. He would not relent; this is who he was, and he was going to die before deferring to a greater power and a humane cause. Pharaoh would rather destroy his country and see his people die before doing the right thing and free an enslaved people. That’s really the main point. We forgive people because they are at the mercy of their own emotions. King Solomon, in his Book of Proverbs, said, “Who is strong? One who controls their emotions.” These people are not strong; they are weak. Otherwise, they would be looking to build up their self-worth by making someone else look bad. Probably the biggest issue when someone is the target of people (yes, it’s usually in the plural, mob rule) is how the victims internalize the abuse. They think that since they are the target, they must somehow deserve it. The problem is that no human is perfect it is more than easy to find fault with anyone. Some people just prey on people and you were just there by chance. The important point to all this is that if it wasn’t you, it’d be someone else. And it will be someone else because people who hurt people spend their lives looking for targets and since they’ve devoted so much time and effort, they’re very good at it. The most important takeaway is that it’s not you, it’s them. No one has the right to abuse another person because of who they are. You don’t like that person? Stay away from them. If you have an issue with someone? Talk it out. That takes character and integrity. Remember: it’s easy to sink into the depths of depravity by demeaning another human being. It takes backbone to work to resolve differences. And that’s what Judaism is all about: going for the higher road. Finally, as we say three times each day at the end of the Tefillah: Oh, L-rd, guard my tongue from evil and my lips from speaking deceitfully. And to those who curse, let my soul be silent. Good advice indeed. #FridayNightSermon #Forgiveness

https://youtu.be/Mzb0wOSmKqs Shabbat services this week: Ma'ariv Services Friday evening, January 11, 2019 @ 7:00pm. Shachrit Saturday morning, January 12 @ 9:30am Parshas Bo Shabbat Services the following week: Join us for a Pot Luck, Friday evening, January 18 @ 6pm Ma'ariv Family Services Friday evening, January 18 @ 7pm. Shachrit Saturday morning, January 19 @ 9:30am Services #DvarTorah #TorahCommentary #ParshasBo #ParashatBo

Watch: https://youtu.be/vMaYZ2ZHNsk Read: A friend of mine is a business coach. Lately, she’s been sending out daily affirmations over a period of forty days, one for each day. Although each is different, there are probably three main themes to the group. One of what may be considered one of the most important is that prosperity comes from within, not from without. Consider how we live our lives. We spend most of our waking hours working to please someone: our boss, co-workers, family. The latter is mostly an act of joy and consideration, a responsibility that we all take on willingly. The formers, however, can leave much to be desired. How many times do we lay awake wondering if we’re doing a good or at least satisfactory job, enough that will allow us to remain gainfully employed without the further stress of wondering how we’re going to support ourselves and our family. Usually, it’s not so cut-and-dried; we’re oftentimes at the mercy of another human who is themselves dealing with issues of esteem and security and sometimes we just don’t know how they feel towards us. If we’re in business for ourselves, then we have a coterie of clients about which to worry; are they happy with our performance or are they being courted by a rival about which we’ll find out only too late? Moses approached Pharaoh and said, “Let my people go”. Pharaoh, like many kings and people in charge, didn’t like the idea that there was another Being that had the ability and maybe, yes, the authority, to override his dictums and decrees. His heart was hard, he was stubborn, and he refused to yield. Moses and Aaron, and to a large extent the elders and people of Israel put their faith in Hashem. What they were doing, in allying with Hashem, was right and just so Hashem basically fought their battle for them. The contest between Hashem and Pharaoh ended badly for Pharaoh. Hashem wrought plague after plague against Pharaoh and the Egyptians and still they clung to their wills. For the Israelites’ part, they just let G-d do His work. They acquiesced and did what Moses told them to do. In the end, they won their freedom and they prospered. While we are not going to expect G-d to hit anyone who harasses us with plagues, there is an interesting lesson here. If we do what is right in the eyes of Hashem, ultimately, we will triumph. Now, this doesn’t mean sitting around and waiting for G-d to act. We study Torah, act as righteously as we can, and go on with our lives. We also want to know that we are in G-d’s hands, so to speak. As G-d set up the reward for the newly freed Israelites as the Egyptians gladly paid them for over one hundred years of servitude—working for free—so do we expect that things will ultimately pay off. After all, we are created in G-d’s image and He loves us, so why wouldn’t He want us to prosper, right? In fact, during our daily Morning Blessings, we thank G-d for providing for our daily needs. There is also an insertion in our weekday Tefillah—the Amidah—that speaks to prosperity. During the prayer of asking Hashem to hear our prayers, we ask Him to provide us more than our daily bread in a righteous but not forbidden manner, that we may be prosperous and do Torah. Consider an extreme way of looking at this situation. The second commandment states that we shall have no other gods before us. If we are kowtowing to a boss, landlord, friend, are we not, in a sense worshipping a foreign god? Yes, it’s a stretch to consider it in this light, but the lengths that some people go through to appease these people, you’d really have to wonder. We have to look within if we want to succeed and feel content, not from without. Consider, again, the Hashem watches us and watches out for us. It may not happen when we want or when we think it ought to but try opening yourself up to letting G-d help you. Approach your challenges to do the right thing and take comfort in knowing that Hashem is on your side and ultimately you will prevail in a righteous, but not forbidden manner. #FridayNightSermon #RelyingonHashem

https://youtu.be/8yj-Bjen5BU Upcoming Services: Shabbat services this week: Ma'ariv Services Friday evening, January 4 @ 7pm. Shachrit Saturday morning, January 5 @ 9:30am Parshas Vaera / פרשת וארא Shabbat Services the following week: Ma'ariv Services Friday evening, January 11, 2019 @ 7pm. Shachrit Saturday morning, January 12 @ 9:30am Parshas Bo Mid-Year General Membership Meeting, Sunday, January 13, 2019 @ 10:00am #ParashatVaera5779 #DvarTorah #TorahCommentary

https://youtu.be/j_JHcgXLi7k It is written that “there is none else beside Him”, meaning that there is no other power in the world with the ability to do anything against Him. And what man sees, namely, that there are things in the world, which deny the household of above, is because He wills it so. And it is deemed a correction, called “the left rejects and the right adducts, meaning that that which the left rejects is considered correction. This means that there are things in the world, which from the beginning aim to divert a person from the right way, and they reject him from holiness. And the benefit from these rejections is that through them a person receives a need and a complete desire for God to help him, since he sees that otherwise he is lost. Not only does he not progress in his work, but he sees that he regresses, and he lacks the strength to observe Torah and Mitzvoth even if not for Her name. That only by genuinely overcoming all the obstacles, above reason, he can observe Torah and Mitzvoth. But he does not always have the strength to overcome above reason, that otherwise he is forced to deviate, God forbid, from the way of the Creator, and even from not for Her name. And he, who always feels that the shattered is greater than the whole, meaning that there are a lot more descents than ascents, and he does not see an end to these predicaments, and he will forever remain outside of holiness, for he sees that it is difficult for him to observe even as little as a jot, unless through overcoming above reason, but he is not always able to overcome. And what shall be the end of it all? Then he reaches the decision that no one can help him, but God Himself. This causes him to make a heartfelt demand of the Creator to open his eyes and heart, to bring him nearer to eternal adhesion with God. It follows than, that all the rejections he had experienced had come from the Creator. That means that the rejections he had experienced were not because he was at fault, for not having the ability to overcome, but because these rejections are for those who truly want to draw nearer to God. And in order for such a person not to be satisfied with only a little, namely, not to remain as a little child without knowledge, he receives help from above so that he will not be able to say that Thank God, he observes Torah and performs good deeds and what else could he ask for? And only if that person has a true desire, he will receive help from Above. And he is constantly shown how his faults in his present state; that is, he is sent thoughts and views, which work against his efforts. This is in order for him to see that he is not one with the Lord. And as much as he overcomes, he always sees how he is found in a position farther from holiness than others, who feel one with the Lord. But he, on the other hand, always has his complaints and demands, and he cannot justify the behavior of the Creator, and how he behaves toward him. And it pains him that he is not one with the Lord, until he comes to feel that he has no part in holiness whatsoever. And although he is occasionally awakened from above, which momentarily revives him, but soon he falls into an abyss. However, this is what causes him to come to realize that only God can help and really draw him closer. A man must always try and cleave to the Creator, namely, that all his thoughts will be about Him. That is to say, that even if he is in the worst state, from which there cannot be a greater descent, he should not leave His domain, namely, think that there is another authority which prevents him from entering into holiness, and which has the power to either benefit or harm. That is, he must not think that there is a matter of the power of the Other Side (sitra achrah), which does not allow man to do good deeds and follow God’s ways; but he should think that all is done by the Creator. The Ba’al Shem Tov said, that he who says that there is another power in the world. Namely shells, is in a state of “serving other gods”, that it is not necessarily the thought of heresy that is the sin, but if he thinks that there is another authority and force apart from the Creator, by that he is committing a sin. Furthermore, he who says that man has his own authority, meaning that he says that yesterday he himself did not want to follow God’s ways, that too is considered to be committing the sin of heresy. Meaning that he does not believe that only the Creator leads the world. But when he has committed a sin, and he must certainly regret it and be sorry for having committed it, but here too we should place the pain and sorrow in the right order: where does he place the cause of the sin, that it is that point he should be sorry for. And a man should then feel sorry and say: “I committed that sin because the Creator hurled me down from holiness to a place of filth, to the lavatory, where the filth is”. That is to say that God gave him a desire and a craving to amuse himself and breath air in a place of stench. (And you might say, as it says in the books, that sometimes a man incarnates in the body of a pig, that he receives a desire and craving to take livelihood from things he had already determined were litter, but now he again wants to revive himself in them). And also when a man feels he’s in a state of ascent, and tastes some good flavor in the work, he must not say: “Now I am in a state where I understand that it is worthwhile to worship God. Rather he should know that now the Lord has fancied him, and for that reason He draws him near, which is the reason why he tastes a good flavor in the work. And he should be careful never to leave the domain of holiness, and say that there is another operating force besides the Creator. (But this means that the matter of finding favor in the eyes of the Lord, or the opposite, does not depend on man himself, but everything depends on God. And man, with his external mind, cannot comprehend why now the Lord likes him and after that He does not.) And likewise when he regrets that the Creator does not draw him near, he should also be careful not to be sorry for himself, for having been distanced from the Creator, for by so doing he becomes a recipient for his own benefit, and he who receives is separated from the Creator. Rather he should regret the exile of the Divine Presence, meaning, for inflicting sorrow upon the Divine Presence. One should take as an example when some small organ of a person is sore. The pain is still felt mainly in the heart and mind, which are the generality of man. And certainly the sensation of a single organ cannot resemble the sensation of a person’s full stature, where most of the pain is felt. Likewise is the pain that a person feels when he is detached from the Lord, since man is but a single organ of the Divine Presence, for the Divine Presence is the soul of Israel in general. Therefore the sensation of a single organ does not resemble the sensation of the pain in general. That is to say that the Divine Presence regrets that there are parts of it that are detached from it, which she cannot provide for. (And that might be the meaning of the words: “When a man regrets, the Divine Presence says: “It is lighter than my head”). And if man does not relate the sorrow at being distant from God to himself, he is saved from falling into the trap of the desire to receive for himself, which is the separation from holiness. The same applies when one feels somewhat closer to holiness, when he is happy at having merited favor in the eyes of the Lord, he must say that the core of his joy is that now there is joy in the Divine Presence, from having being able to bring her private organ near her, and not send it away. And man rejoices at having been endowed with the ability to please the Divine Presence. And this goes by the same token, because joy that an individual feels, is but a part of the joy that the whole feels. And through these calculations he loses his individuality and avoids being trapped by the Other Side, which is the will to receive for himself. Although, the will to receive is necessary, since that constitutes a person, since anything which exists in a person apart from the desire to receive is attributed to the Creator. Nevertheless, the will to receive pleasure should be corrected to a form of bestowal. That is to say, that the pleasure and joy, taken by the will to receive, should be intended to bring contentment above, because there is pleasure below. For that was the purpose of creation, to benefit His creations. And this is called the joy of the Divine Presence above. For this reason, man must seek advice as to how he can cause contentment above. And certainly, if he receives pleasure, contentment shall be felt above. Therefore, he should long to always be in the King’s palace, and to have the ability to play with the King’s treasures. And that will certainly cause contentment above. It follows that his entire longing should be for the sake of the Creator. Author: Rabbi Yehuda Ashlag #FridayNightSermon

https://youtu.be/awxMROt9WlA Shabbat services this week: Ma'ariv Services Friday evening, December 28 @ 7pm. Shachrit Saturday morning, December 29 @ 9:30am Parshas Shemos / פרשת שמות Shabbat Services the following week: Ma'ariv Services Friday evening, January 4, 2019 @ 7pm. Shachrit Saturday morning, January 5 @ 9:30am Parshas Vaera / פרשת וארא #ParashatShmot5779 #TorahCommentary #TorahPortion #10MinuteTorah

https://youtu.be/G0k1DbNUXwE This week’s portion, Vayechi—He lived—closes out the book of Genesis. Next up, the book of Exodus introduces us to Moshe Rabbeinu, who is the main character of the rest of the Torah. It is Moses who has the strongest and most profound relationship with Hashem and has been chosen to deliver His message. Hence the name of the Chumash as the Five Books of Moses. Genesis served as a lead up to the last four books. How? First of all, let’s understand what Torah is. The word “Torah” has been both translated and interpreted as “Law” and “Teaching”. It is the fundamentals of life that G-d transmitted through Moses. It is here, in these subsequent books, that Moses receives the primary, Ten Commandments, and then the rest of G-d’s teachings in the form of commandments. What is really Torah and the commandments? Laws, Teachings, yes, but really, let’s face it, they’re rules, 613 dos and don’ts. Up to now, there hadn’t been any codified system of behaving, of regulating how society interacts with each other. Up to now, yes, there may have been some systems of justice, as in Noah’s time, but for the most part, people did what they wanted to do. The people of Noah’s time saw just how ineffectual courts and justice were and stole from each other as they saw fit. They were destroyed. The people of Abraham’s time—Sodom and Gemorrah—didn’t like strangers and mistreated and persecuted them. They, too, were the recipients of G-d’s wrath. What made our Patriarchs—Abraham, Isaac and Jacob—stand out and be pleasing in the eyes of Hashem, was their intuitive grasp of these divine ideals. Their integrity and character stood out as they treated their fellows as the children of Hashem, with respect. They always strove to do the just and humane thing. It was after the great enslavement of our ancestors in Egypt that G-d decided to codify his Law. It was necessary that we all had a playbook that told us how to act and behave. In fact, one of our great sages, in the Talmud tractate of Shabbat, remarked that had the Hebrews not received Torah, we would have destroyed the world. Why? Because we’re a stiff-necked people that apparently needs limits. The paragraphs of the Shema are very poignant on this point. The first paragraph, commonly known as the “V’Ahavta”, states that individually we should not follow eyes or our heart, but only follow the Commandments. The next paragraph expands this commandment in the plural. So we are not only responsible for our own behavior, but we are only responsible for each other’s behavior. We do for ourselves and then serve as a check on our fellows. As further reminders, we put tzitzit on our garments and mezuzot on our doorposts and gates. You see, G-d knows we are willful and have a tendency to do what we want, make up the rules or interpret the rules as we go along. But we need rules in order to get along. In order for society to function efficiently, we must have a frame of reference and have faith that we will be able to conduct business confidently and with security that everyone will live up to their part of the deal. Otherwise, business doesn’t get done and no one prospers. We need those parameters in order to know how to engage. It’s like baseball. You get three strikes or four balls. That’s it. No more and no less. On the other hand, if the last strike is a foul ball, it doesn’t count as a strike. You may not like that, but that’s the rule and it applies to everyone equally. You can hit foul balls until the cows come home; you’re still up. I once watched a player hit foul balls for 15 minutes until he finally hit a home run. Naturally the other team wasn’t happy, but again, those are the rules and they apply to everyone. So deal with it, right? And by the way, the same rule can help you. Still, some people just want to do their own thing. They either interpret rules as they see fit, cherry picking to suit their own agenda. If one were to Google “Toxic Work Place”, there would be articles from business psychologists and coaches in places such as Forbes magazines. A classic example of an environment in which people do according to their hearts or eyes. In Toxic Work Environments, we see managers applying rules unfairly, like where one person is rewarded while another is punished for doing the same thing. This is why they have long meetings where nothing gets done, because they just don’t want to face reality or work in the real world. Too hard. And of course, they’re never to blame, it’s always one specific scapegoat. And when that scapegoat decides they’ve had enough and leaves, they simply find another because after all, it’s not them. Such environments and situations can be very frustrating and trying. How do we deal with this? Just like our ancestors. We stick to our principles. We find strength in our integrity and character. Abraham welcomed the stranger while Sodom and Gemorrah persecuted those not like them. Jacob honored his arrangement with Laban who changed the terms “hundreds of times”. In the end, both of them thrived and lived to see happy days. This is because while things may seem tough and unfair, in the end, goodness wins out because reality is reality. It takes a lot of inner strength to be moral while others are taking shortcuts. And it is specifically that strength that gives you the resolve to succeed and overcome.